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Diet Mountain Dew… for the Mature Soda Drinker
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Diet Mountain Dew… for the Mature Soda Drinker

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Retroist
Mar 30, 2015
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Diet Mountain Dew… for the Mature Soda Drinker
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Remember the good ol’ days? When you spent your summer days hanging down by the river? You had a Mountain Dew in one hand and a rope in the other. No one could swing across that River like you back then. You felt like those days would never end.

Now you are a bit older and have switched to a diet soda. Sure, you like the taste, but it’s the knowing that bothers you. Knowing that your body can no longer handle the high sugar content of real Mountain Dew without turning flabby.

So each time you pop open a can, it is like another nail in the coffin of your youth. When Deb and Susie brought it up at that lake party, how could you not jump in the lake to prove that you still had that spark that made you feel alive?

Okay, so you embarrassed your boss and are probably going to get fired on Monday, but for a brief moment, you felt the Dew, and that makes it all worth it.


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