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Vampire-themed Video Game Box Art
No other creature of the night has appeared in so many different genres of fiction as Vampires. From fantasy, horror, sci-fi, romance (I promise, no more Twilight references), action, period pieces, you name it, something with fangs and a fear of the sun has sucked some blood in it. Of course, video games are no exception, with fang heads as villains and a few times the good guys. However, this article is not about the history and importance of Vampires in video games, but rather some really funky covers that feature them.
“Thank you for calling Vampire Technical support, my name is Vlad, how can I assist you this evening? Hmmmm, okay, have you unplugged your fangs and then plugged them back into your victim and blood is still not flowing? No, okay. Is this person your first victim of the evening? Did you use your enthralling gaze after your Bat shapeshifting? I am going to need you to find the blood time type and place of origin of your victim. While you do this, I am going to place you on hold and prep an on site visit from one of our In the Field Victim Blood Flow specialists, just in case we are unable to resolve the issue over the phone.”
A screaming vampire with a headset makes me chuckle greatly. I mean, isn’t it going to get in the way of his neck biting. This is why the vampire community as a whole adopted the small Bluetooth headsets early. Though the vamp on the cover looks nothing like Michael Douglas, it reminds me of the first Wall Street movie. Maybe it’s from a movie in between the two movies, like “Wall Street 1.5: Blood Never Sleeps.”
The Astonishing Adventures of Mr. Weems and the She Vampires
Sit back, relax and take a moment to enjoy every little bit of this cover. Go ahead, I’ll wait.
Behold our little nebbish hero, his plain blue suit, this 1950′s reporter glasses and bizarre Tommy Gun with a revolver cylinder in it. Inspires fear in the hearts of all vampires, huh? Speaking of the vampires, our titular She Vampires, how did the one on the right fit in that coffin? Are they collapsible? In the end, does it matter?
Look into my eyes! No really, look into them and not the stupid sun that takes up way too much of the cover. I wonder if the cover art lacked the budget to put fangs on the vampire, so they just threw the sun in there. Good thick eyebrows, though, I would gaze into those forehead caterpillars for hours. This cover is just so uninspired, a collection of images, slapped together. . . .oh look, this is another one of those full motion movie video games from the early to mid 1990s, that explains everything. As a whole, covers to those style of game are stinko and this one is no exception.
The Twisted Tales of Spike McFang
Let’s just take this cover for what it is, a cover to a cutesy, colorful Super Nintendo Action RPG (wait, a colorful Super Nintedo Action RPG, I need to try this game) so we really cannot fault the goofy design of our little bloodsucker. Actually, I like Spike’s design, jaunty top hat, stripped vest, what looks like Reebok Pumps for shoes, all things that work well. It’s not the small garlic Goomba that I question, it’s the strange, purple pants wearing, pale-skinned Easter Island head creature. What is that thing? I am sure if I played the game it would make sense, but for now, I want to squash its stupid little head. Or suck its blood out till it’s an empty husk of a being, one of the two.
In my humble opinion, this is one of the best video game cover in the history of cart based artwork. It is so good that I have the game in a shadowbox, hanging up in my living room. Right there in the foreground we have our hero, Simon Belmont, looking buff, luscious locks of hair a-flowing and his might weapons, the whip “Vampire Killer,” whirling around, ready to kick some vampire butt. Simon is the anti-Mr. Weems.
Looking up we have the castle of Dracula, daunting and evil, a great taste of the epic-ness of the journey you are about to engage in. Even the moon’s phase is a great choice, the crescent moon looking sharp and foreboding. I am in on this cover already, and we yet to get to the Lord of all Vampires himself, Dracula.
Dracula looks fantastic on this cover, sharp and angular with the long ears, glowing eyes, deadly fangs with a singular drip of blood falling from his mouth. That is a villain that both puts a little shiver down your spine and emboldens your resolve to put an end to his reign of evil. I can go on and on about this cover (even the C is Castlevania is great, etc.) but really, just enjoy this one Retroist fans, it’s a classic.