Who needs fireworks? I have Novelty Snaps

Nothing like a little gunpowder action to “interest up“© a boring night. So sit back, relax grab a cold glass of something and if you listen very closely you might be able to hear the distant snap of POP POP Snappers. Let’s Bang drop em!

I grew up in New Jersey, where fireworks are illegal. That doesn’t mean you couldn’t get them. You just had to go around the corner to the old guy who’s shed was filled with illicit sky candy.

I would slowly pick and choose what I wanted to spend my 8 dollars on. The sweat would soak my clothes as I stood in the dimly lit 150 degree shed surrounded by explosives.

You know in retrospect my childhood is very frightening.

Now, fireworks were only available in the “June – August heatstroke season”. So when you wanted to burn stuff or make stuff go boom any other time you either needed a gallon of gasoline and a lighter, or some “Snakes” and “Snaps”.

I tried to get my hands on some Snakes for this story, and I am actually relieved I couldn’t lay my hands on them. If you haven’t seen them, they are these horrible smelling black pellets that turn into snakey ash when fire is applied. They are really gross and messy, yet oddly hypnotizing.

Snaps on the other hand are always a good time. They are small pieces of paper filled with gunpowder (they are a class C explosive) and they make a pop when they are thrown at a hard surface.

The package itself is filled with low grade sawdust that got into my eye as soon as I opened it. The box looks the same as it did when I was a kid, but the question is does their fun factor hold up to my adult sensibilities. Oh, YES!

When I was a kid, I would throw them in the street. I wouldn’t dare throw them in the house as a kid, but now I am an adult, and I am reckless, so I am throwing these suckers all over the place.

In fact, they are a lot of fun to throw at the TV. Not happy with some judge’s comments on American Next Big Something?

Drop a SNAP on that judge!

Put some under the lid of the toilet seat for a special surprise for the next person to use the bowl. You are only limited by your imagination.

Oh, and shall we take this up a notch? Oh, yes! Do not put in mouth? Well, if I must.

Not cool. It popped, but the taste is horrible. I have never tasted gunpowder before, and now I know why it is not a major condiment.

No noticeable damage to my teeth.