Jabba and the Jock – A Tale of Friends

I was 15 years old and hanging out on the “Nerd” rung of the high-school social ladder. I could run a computer, played D&D and had an unhealthy obsession with toys, especially Star Wars action figures. Lets set the record straight, I have no regrets about how I spent one minute of my high-school years. I loved them all and would do it again, I’m sure most would call me a lucky one.

In grade 9 I met the tortured soul of my story, a guy I called “Speedy”. Speedy was a good dude, loved comics, music, toys, but Speedy was a Dun!.Dun.!.Dun! “JOCK”. He was a master basketball player. So many of his social interests mixed like oil and water. I got to know Speedy goofing around in Math class, then started secretly hanging out with him. We never hung out except for secret runs to the comic shop or checking Walmart for toys. Did I hold this secret friend ship against him? No, not in the slightest.

We just had a great time hanging out doing stuff he never got to do his jock friends. One day we were talking comics and action figures that we wish mom hadn’t sold at garage sales, or been desecrated by younger siblings. I said to Speedy that one thing I wish I still had was my Jabba the Hutt.

I know you know what I’m talking about. It was awesome! A big plastic Jabba with sitting stone, pit door action, ornamental hooka and small salacious crumb action figure. It might have had less or more accessories, my memory is not perfect, but I am sure it was one of my fave toys and I had sadly lost it over the years.

Days back then passed like they tended to do except for this one amazing day. Speedy corners me at my Locker and says “Bro, this is for you.” I take the plastic bag he is eagerly jabbing at me and look inside and to my amazement I pull out a Jabba the Hutt figurine. Now, no stone base with pitt door action or other accessories but the big green slug himself. Of course I am in shock but then ask the obvious first question, where he had gotten this, and secondly why was it caked in dirt?

Turns out when Speedy was 8 he had and his friends had buried Jabba under his friend’s house porch and as kids do, forgot where he had left it, but us talking about it had jogged his memory! That Jabba the Hutt figure had been in the ground for 7 years! Not only did he dig it up, but his friend hadn’t lived there in years, so he had to get the new owners permission to dig under the porch.

Speedy, thanks for the Jabba and proof the Hutts can live at least 7 years underground.


Still into stuff that you've probably long forgotten.

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