Twin Peaks

Twin Peaks is back…and it’s bringing action figures

Diane, it’s almost ten o’clock on Monday night, and I’ve just discovered something stupendous, something I never thought I’d see. No, not coffee that somehow manages to be even blacker than black, although that does sound pretty good right now. I’ve just discovered that Funko is about to unleash Twin Peaks action figures on the world.

At the 2017 London Toy Fair, Funko – best known currently for its seemingly endless variety of Vinyl Pop figures – unveiled not only Twin Peaks Vinyl Pops, but a selection of four 3 and 3/4″ Twin Peaks action figures as well. Perhaps it would be best to say that only three of them are action figures; one of the figures doesn’t really move…but then, the character of Laura Palmer didn’t really move much once she was wrapped in plastic.
Twin Peaks

As is often the case, Funko’s choice of characters to produce in what is often referred to as “the Star Wars scale” is both iconic and frustrating. Audrey and Leland, at least, get Vinyl Pops, but there’s no 3 and 3/4″ love for those all-important characters; the quartet of figures instead consists of Agent Dale Cooper, the Log Lady, the aforementioned plastic-wrapped corpse of Laura Palmer, and “Bob”, the spirit form of a deadly presence that inhabited more than one resident of Twin Peaks in the show’s two seasons on ABC. (It could be that the character choices are tied closely to Twin Peaks’ upcoming revival in May on Showtime – only time will tell.)

There is a welcome development for this latest round of 3 and 3/4″ figures from Funko – the “Star Wars standard” of five points of articulation (neck, shoulders, legs) has given way to nine point instead (adding elbow and knee joints); this slightly more modern approach puts these figures on a par with Big Bang Pow!’s Flash Gordon, Big Bang Theory and KISS action figures in the same scale. (Laura Palmer has no points of articulation, being dead and all. Blame it on rigor mortis…and hang her next to Carbonite Han in Jabba’s Palace.)


Will we ever get more characters in this format from Funko, which has drastically scaled back its ReAction line of 3 and 3/4″ figures in recent years? Overproduction of past 3 and 3/4″ lines such as Gremlins and classic Star Trek has given way to a more collector-oriented “boutique” approach with more recent licenses such as The Dark Crystal, The Golden Girls, and E.T.; however, Funko has irked a few collectors by not returning to the well for licenses that did prove popular. A good example of this was its Firefly license, which never delivered figures in any scale for Shepherd Book, River Tam, or Simon Tam, let alone any secondary or enemy characters – no Reavers, no Badger, no YoSaffBridge. Anyone who spent any time watching Twin Peaks at the height of its popularity knows that the show was about far more than just these four characters (one of whom is, it has to be said again for emphasis, dead and motionless); whether we’ll ever get more than three characters and a plastic corpse remains to be seen.

It’s also not known if these figures will be individually carded or sold as a boxed set, a la the more recent E.T. and Golden Girls box sets.

Funko’s line of Twin Peaks 3 and 3/4″ figures will arrive later this year.

Big Lots DVD Box Sets

If you happen to live near a Big Lots, you might swing by and check out their DVD collection. Along with their normal $5 DVDs and and $8 Blu-ray discs, I found several complete television seasons for $10.

big-lots-dvds

That’s Family Ties (Season One) and Twin Peaks (Season Two) for $10 each. I already own the Family Ties, and would have picked up the Twin Peaks set if I had been able to find Season One of it as well. I also found Season Three of Gomer Pyle and a few other random oddities. If you’re a fan of older television shows, you should enjoy digging through their stock.

Fan-Made Twin Peaks Atari Game

It’s officially creepy time, and things don’t get much creepier than David Lynch’s surreal murder mystery from 1990. Outside of the cliffhanger ending, the true Twin Peaks fan had two questions:

  1. Why wasn’t there a Twin Peaks video game?
  2. Why wasn’t there a Twin Peaks Atari 2600 game? (How would a TP game have come out on a system that was defunct well before it aired? Only the log knows…)

Well, ask no more, Laura Palmer groupies. Jak Locke has created Twin Peaks: Escape From the Black Lodge. In it, you guide Agent Dale Cooper through the titular otherworld, complete with creepy dwarves and acres of red drapes. The game looks a lot like the (shudder) Indiana Jones 2600 game, and is apparently quite challenging. It is also said to pack some Easter eggs.

It can be downloaded here. And remember, the owls are not what they seem.