Tim-Mee’s Cavemen and Battle Mountain

We had a lot of fun remembering Tim-Mee’s Galaxy Laser Team plastic figures. Recently, Jeff let me know about a new Tim-Mee set of plastic figures that have been reissued. It is the Cave Men set and their Battle Mountain playset.

The Cave Men themselves are great, but it is the mountain that really makes them fantastic. I like that it has three levels and several caves and passages. This was the kind of thing that would keep me busy for hours as a kid, imaging the cavemen building fires and gathering grubs…ok, who am I kidding, I just had them knocking each other off the ledges to their doom. You can check out my review here.

You can get the cavemen here and the cave here. Also, Jeff told me about a line of military vehicles you can find here, here, here, and here.

Great Video Game Music: X-Men The Arcade Game

Over the next few weeks I will be scouring the retro gaming scene for the best video game music.

So I’m throwing you a curve ball here (wow check out the Brit using an American slang term) and using some music from an arcade game. X-Men (1992) was released by Konami and I’m almost positive that hardly anyone would have heard this at the arcade with all the many games shouting out their own form of musical advertisement.  I was lucky enough to visit a friend who owns a cabinet featuring this very game and was engrossed (I also laughed hard at the Magneto quote “welcome to die”). This is defiantly Japanese arcade music at its fullest and I think it has some Capcom influences . They were both using the Sound CPU: Z80 (all be it Konami at 8 MHz) and two Sound Chips: YM2151 and K054539. Ok I’m getting technical now I had better finish this here before the (Gweat and tewerble) editor Retroist decides to see if I have mutant healing powers by beating me with the business end of  a Mos technology SID chip still connected to his C64 and let me tell you, that will leave a mark (if not on your body then on your mind)

*only E-beatings will be acceptable, real life beatings may be met with a letter from my lawyer (who has an adamantium bonded to his skeleton)

Women Love The 1970’s Man

All they had to do was groom their mustache or fluff their perfectly permed hair and stewardesses would swoon. A mere mention of their sensitive side and the all too caring nurse and tightly wound school teacher would peel of their cloths and leap into the faux-wood whirlpool hot tub. They were men, men of the 1970s and they were a mysterious lot.

Not much is know about them today save that they were very hairy and quite adept with the ladies. But how did they do it? Let’s take a look at some artifacts that they left behind and maybe we can spot some patterns that will reveal to we modern humans some of the secrets of Homo Groovus (Groovy Man).

Interesting, the 70’s man likes to drink. Does not seem much different from today’s man, but look how the woman is hanging on his broad shoulders. Surely it can’t just be the drink? Can it? I decided to follow up on the whole drinking thing and found this ad for Colony Wine. Which stars the great and powerful Spencer Milligan. You might know him better as Rick Marshall from Land of the Lost.

Now this guy is interesting. He is hairy, like the guy in the first ad, but he doesn’t have a mustache. So its not the mustache like I had hoped. Notice this guy has a very 1970’s hobby, photography. And see how he says up front, he takes pictures only for himself? That way if they suck he has an out. He isn’t taking pictures to please the world. He comes across as laid back, as confident — This Colony Wine guy is very clever. (Didn’t Drago in Rocky IV say he only fights for himself right before he loses? Clever Russian?)

Looking around that guys “pad” I didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary. Save that it was very masculine and had mellow music playing. I figured I would look into what music people in the 70’s enjoyed and found “Heartbeat”

So what do we see in common? Well both guys in these commercials have cool music, hot fireplaces, full heads of hair and confidence to spare. Could it be that simple? Could modern men have lost touch with these 4 simple Commandments that will deliver unto them all the women they could ever want? It couldn’t be this easy, these guys must be wealthy or famous right? Wrong! I was not able to find the Heartbeat guy, but the Colony Wine guy’s day job? Pharmacist.

So just remember if you want to be just like 1970’s man follow these 4 simple rules.

  1. Get some cool music. Air Supply works well and even Kenny Rogers will do in a pinch. Just make sure the music is about sweet love.
  2. Get the largest fireplace you can find and make sure it is always running. You never know when a Swedish door to door bikini saleswoman will come a knocking
  3. Hair! Grow it out. Get it thick and lustrous or permed. Remember you are the king and it is your crown.
  4. Be confident. Even if you have no idea what you are doing. Make sure everyone thinks you do. This applies to all things especially emergencies (plane crashes, tracheotomies)

Men, get these 4 things right and we could have a 1970’s renaissance. If you think that’s not the most awesome thing that could happen, let me just remind you of the sexy swinging stewardesses of “Flying High”.

Thanks Schneider