Coleco - Skulk

Secaturs Laid Low By Bugs…Coleco Confidential!

Holy cats, how long has it been since I’ve graced you boils and ghouls with a lil’ purple prose from your’s cruelly ’round these parts? Too long I say…and just why have I made my return with all of the award losing style and grace I am known for? Well, because ol’ vicious Vic Sage posted about those sexy Sectaurs the other day and that got my ol’ noggin juices a flowin’!

You see, I lived my misspent youth in a bucolic little industrial town nestled within the foothills of the Adirondack mountains…and what we lacked in big box retailers and solid gold roller skate rinks we more than made up for in poopy smelling factories; 99% of which were leather mills…but oh, the other glorious 1% was a manufacturing plant for none other than Coleco (which I guess isn’t so strange when you realize Coleco started life as the Connecticut Leather Company).
Coleco - Davy Crockett

And what did those nimble lil’ fingers of those industrious workers put together? A bunch of stuff, but also Sectaurs…that is until the incident (cue dramatic music and thunderstorm f/x).
Coleco - Amsterdam - New York

You see, those bodacious bugs our insect pals road around on were covered in fur, and said fur was flown in from parts unknown (perhaps Symbion itself…or China…I’m going with Symbion), and said pelts, though synthetic, were loaded…nay, infested with fleas…and that’s all she wrote on that one. Alanis couldn’t have come up with richer irony than a bug based toyline taken down by bugs…
Coleco - Sectaurs Catalog

There are other stories too, like every kid in school who’s parents worked at that plant had a talking ALF doll…it was like unto a furry Dr. Theopolis (Theopoli…biddi biddi biddi…whatevs) hanging off their person dispensing that beloved Melmacian wit.
Coleco - Talking Alf Doll

Or the fact that enterprising scamps would scale the fence of the factory, steal Colecovision eproms from the dumpsters and sell them to kids sort of like (but definitely not for legal reasons) me. But that is a tale for another age my fine fiends!

[Via] Scottith Games

Speaking of Melmacian wit, cast your peepers on this vintage Coleco commercial for one of their dolls!

[Via] PhakeNam

Rescue In Gargamel's Castle

Smurf – Rescue In Gargamel’s Castle

My husband and I went to a cool retro gaming shop in Northeastern Ohio last year (we drove 4 hours to buy video games…there aren’t any good shops in our area for that kind of thing!), and upon seeing the wall of Atari and ColecoVision games, I may have shed a few tears (read: I cried…a lot). While I was happy to see so many wonderful games on the shelves, mostly I was flooded with emotion and remembering so many great times at my Grandparents’ house. Sadly, I began writing this the day after my Grandmother’s funeral – she had been battling vascular dementia for several years, and will finally be at peace. I am sure that was really driving the wave of emotion, as we knew it’d be soon, but it never makes it any easier.

As I was looking through the games, I spotted one I played a LOT when I was a kid – Smurf: Rescue In Gargamel’s Castle. I’ll be the first to admit this game doesn’t look like much. It’s really pretty simple to play, and there isn’t a ton of strategy or skill to it. Still, at 5 or 6 years old, getting to dodge bats, and birds is pretty cool. I grabbed it, even though we don’t own a ColecoVision system*, for the sheer nostalgia factor. We did have it on one of our Atari emulators, so I played that to satisfy my whim.

Rescue in Gargamel's Castle

Smurf: Rescue In Gargamel’s Castle is a single-player platformer developed in 1982 by Coleco for the ColecoVision and Atari 2600, and obviously based off of the cartoon series. This game is very simple – upon selecting your skill level, you are greeted with a little hut beside a path, and a perky little Smurf waiting for adventure. You are presented with obstacles along the way – fences, tall grass and small hills, stalagmites and creepy bats, and crazy-fast spiders – until you reach the inside of the castle, where Gargamel has your beloved Smurfette locked away. All this amazing action while faced with a time limit and cloyingly sweet music – my palms are sweating just thinking about it!

Rescue in Gargamel's Castle - Leve Three Opening

Rescue in Gargamel's Castle - Game Options Menu
There are a total of four skill levels per player setting – you can select a one-player game, or an alternating-turn two-player option. The levels grow increasingly frustrating as you adjust the skill setting – not because they’re terribly complex, but the game is very touchy when coming into contact with your foes:

* Level 1 – smaller obstacles, no flying creatures and is relatively easy to clear quickly; you get five lives.
* Level 2 – introduces flying birds, taller cliffs to jump, flying bats in the cave, and freaking spiders who are fast as…well, they’re pretty darn fast. Again, you’re allotted five lives, and the level isn’t difficult to clear LIES! The level, while it isn’t the most difficult, can still be challenging. If you can manage to clear the spiders, you have my respect.
* Level 3 – the distance between obstacles to jump is closer than previous levels, and I swear it feels like the birds and bats have a homing device planted in your little Smurf cap. (I can’t make it through the caves, I’ll be honest. (*shakes fist & mumbles* stupid bats!))
* Level 4 – the birds and bats come back for you, man! Even if you manage to duck out of the first attack, they come back! The energy bar seems to deplete faster, too. Five lives never seem enough. I have never managed to beat level four, so there’s that.

Rescue in Gargamel's Castle - Spiders

If you die repeatedly in the same spot, the layout will change a bit; it can be argued it makes it a little easier to clear, depending on whom you ask. Scoring is simple – each item you jump has a point value assigned to it on the screen, usually 200 or 300 points – the catch is landing precisely on the number! As if clearing the spikey stalagmites without impaling your little blue body isn’t hard enough, you have to stick your landing EXACTLY on the 200. Rescuing Smurfette yields a whopping 10,000 points! If you manage to make it through the scene quickly enough, you’ll be rewarded with bonus energy! Huzzah!

Rescue in Gargamel's Castle - Smurfette

Smurfs: Rescue In Gargamel’s Castle is pretty much an endless loop – once you’ve reached Smurfette, the game will revert back to the opening scene for you to start over, with a few minor tweaks. This game also features a couple easter eggs – one is rather infamous and involves Smurfette (accomplished by exiting and re-entering the final screen quickly and the white pixels on the top of her dress disappear (along with the whites of her eye…creepy!)), and the other is in the forest scene – supposedly flipping back and forth between two screens may reveal a set of initials and you may receive ‘hundreds of thousands of points’ according to the interwebz. I have not been able to replicate this – either on the emulated version or on the actual cartridge version, so I can’t attest to the legitimacy of the latter eggy goodness.

As you can see from the screen grabs – the game isn’t flashy, and gameplay is really basic. The game doesn’t have a huge following because of this – really, it’s not an amazing game – but I think the nostalgia factor wins out in making this game memorable for me.

*I am happy to report that this is no longer the case – Husband surprised me with one, which arrived in the mail as I began writing this! Oh how I love the ColecoVision!

Rescue in Gargamel's Castle - Colecovision

Have you played Smurfs: Rescue In Gargamel’s Castle? I’d love to know what you think of it!

[Via] Old Classic Retro Gaming

Speaking of things Smurfy. Do you recall the mystery of the Green Smurf?

Retroist Coleco Adam Podcast

Retroist Coleco Adam Podcast

Welcome to the Retroist Coleco Adam Podcast. On today’s show I talk all about the much maligned, but somehow well-loved computer system, The Coleco Adam. I start off talking about how the undependability of the Adam ruined a birthday party I went to as a kid. Then I talk about the company who made the system, the merits of the computer, some of the problems it had, its receptions and more. Music throughout the show was provided by Peachy.

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