The Jolly Green Giant Sits Down for a “Proper Meal”

Looking at that guy, putting on airs. With his fancy bow tie and that thing you wear that looks like the front of a shirt, but if you pull the cord in the cartoon it moves up like a window shade. Man, I knew Jolly Green when he was just an average giant, trying to make it in the world. Before you can say “beat it Sprout”, he was eating fancy meals every night with the Birdseyes and I was out of a job. Now I just work on this nostalgia website all day and dream of the days when I was the sidekick to the Jolliest Giant you ever met.

green-giant

About The Retroist

The Retroist is like a BBQ on a bun without the bones. You're only human daddy. Chomp!
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2 Responses to The Jolly Green Giant Sits Down for a “Proper Meal”

  1. Lidian says:

    You just know the rest of them are thinking; who invited HIM? And is he going to want seconds?

  2. Ugly American says:

    Steroids?

    What makes you think I do steroids?

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